Big East Conference Player Hater Ball

[notkirkcameron]

Drop your beef against Big East teams, coaches, or personalities here.



ACC: Yea, you guys got Syracuse and Louisville, but you've still got Clemson, Virginia Tech, and Boston College, and 8 other teams not named Duke or North Carolina, so good luck with allllllllllll that.

American Athletic Conference: Aside from sounding like the name of that Abercrombie knockoff store at the poor people mall, it's basically "The same Conference USA you knew and loved: But now with more UConn!"

Dayton: You know how annoying it is that one week after the NCAA Tournament field is announced, and the first team left out bitches and moans about their resume and why they deserve to be in....but how their fans generally get over it after a week or two and everyone forgets? Well, Dayton is that scenario if their fans NEVER LET IT GO and talked about it nonstop for a YEAR AND A HALF. It's like they're hung up on their 12th-grade crush who didn't ask them to the Sadie Hawkins dance....but they're still talking about it in the middle of their sophomore year in college. Also, your rebrand spells out "VD."

Butler: Indiana is Chicago's New Jersey (no offense to the Seton Hall fans, who I'm sure resent being compared to Indiana). Also, despite Indy being a reasonably cool city, your campus is in the middle of nowhere, and there isn't even a decent bar around for at least six blocks in any direction from Hinkle. Also, I personally distrust any team that claims to have a "Way."

Big Ten Conference: Love your new commercial. Basically says "Hey, look at all these Midwestern Schools and waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay over here, Rutgers and Maryland." Thanks for ruining college sports, assholes.

Creighton: I went to Nebraska once, well, that's not true. I guess I technically went to Nebraska three times, because on the way in from and out to the airport, I went through Carter Lake, Iowa. How anyone loses a land dispute to Iowa I don't think I'll ever know.

DePaul: Holy crap you guys might have found a spot in Chicago for your new arena that's somehow even more of a pain in the ass to get to than Rosemont. Also, the mascot shares its name with a system where Chicagoans use outdated, worn-out trash that may have been useful once, but hasn't been relevant since the 1980s for personal gain, which is fitting because Rahm Emanuel and DePaul have a similar relationship right now.

Eric Devendorf: Still a horrible c**t of a human being. Easily my least favorite college basketball player ever. I can't even tell you who's in second. That's how big a c**t Eric Devendorf was, and presumably, still is.

Expansion Proponents: All you people who think there's some magic number to maximize our NCAA bids, and we can just get respectability if we "crack the code" and add more East Coast catholic schools, seemingly unaware that such a conference is already around, and called the Atlantic 10. If they had the model down pat, why did Xavier and Butler leave it to join us? Winning games gets you in the tournament. You'd think that would be obvious.

Georgetown: One of the best commentaries I ever read on Georgetown just said "You know how UConn would give their left nut to get into the ACC, well that's nothing compared to what Georgetown would do if the Ivy League ever so much as winked at them." A university in a neighborhood that willfully insisted on not having a Metro stop in the area to keep out the...you know....undesirable element....that now moans about getting students to basketball games when the stadium sits on top of a Metro station is a tad ironic.

Jay Wright: Dude probably uses Armani Suits for toilet paper. God bless the man for getting paid, but you're making the rest of us look bad. Honestly waiting for the game he shows up on the sidelines in f---ing tails.

Marquette: Holy Personality Disorders, Batman. Pick a name and stick with it. You've been the Warriors, the Lightning, the Warriors again, then the Golden Eagles, then nearly the Warriors again (to the point where everyone just calls you that anyway because it's just easier at this point), then for a week you were the Gold and that was f---ing weird, and then back to Golden Eagles...and that's all just since 1993, and not including at least three other nicknames held before then.

Providence: Every single time we play you guys I know something batshit crazy is going to happen. Sometimesliterally. This even continued last year with Davante Gardner all of a sudden finding his range in a game winner that wasn't. It's honestly annoying. Let's try to have two easy, normal games this year.

Rick Pitino: What's the difference between Rick Pitino and the Princeton Offense? Teams that run the Princeton can last more than 15 seconds before getting a shot off.

Syracuse and Pittsburgh: The deepest circle of hell is reserved for traitors. Enjoy your conference tournament gala dinner at the Waffle House in Greensboro. They take cash, credit, or 30 pieces of silver.

St. John's and Seton Hall: Honestly, get your shit together guys. The original Big East was designed to help East Coast recruits stay home with quality competition. They did...but you guys lost the plot somewhere around the Clinton Administration. St. John's biggest game is serving as the biannual homecoming opponent for the Tri-State Chapter of the Duke Alumni Club.

Villanova: What's the difference between Marty McFly and Villanova? Eventually Marty McFly stopped going back to 1985.

Xavier: Yo Dawg, we heard you like X, so we put Xs on your Xs in your Xs on your X. We get it, you guys. Also, how Cookie Monster's slow sperm ever got to be a mascot, I don't think I'll ever know.

[Professor_Bulldog]

Outside of st johns, I don't think there is a more insecure fan base than Creighton. If Greg McDermott so much as shits on a new toilet, sure enough there's a new thread with 4 pages worth of posts puffing it up, just so everyone else knows that he can shit with the best of them. The thread will then devolve into an endless circle jerk over how great it is that they fill their cookie cutter arena with a bunch of corn fed slobs every night.

[robinreed]

Sorry to say this but I actually like everyone in the Big East. Well everyone except Seton Hall and they are not really that bad. It's only that they are in New Jersey.

[billyjack]

Funny stuff Kirk...
Low budget Abercrombie & Fitch...

I always thought it was interesting how TV or movie characters were portrayed in each city... growing up in RI and never crossing the state borders much except to go to Attleboro or Seekonk, these characters were the window to each city...

Working westward:

Queens NY (St John's) - Archie Bunker. Racist, bigoted. Average middle class neighborhood.

New Jersey (Seton Hall) - Tony Soprano. Mafia, glutton, womanizer, murderer.

Washington DC (Georgetown) - Frank Underwood. Crooked, deceitful politician.

Philadelphia (Villanova) - Fresh Prince. Nice kid, precocious. I don't watch "It's Always Sunny", but they seem like oddballs.

Cincinnati (Xavier) - Les Nessman. Serious, nice, geeky, uptight, milquetoast, dependable guy, who takes his job seriously.

Indianapolis (Butler) - Woody Harrelson on "Cheers"... nice, innocent, not too swift, naive farm kid.

Chicago (DePaul) - Bob Newhart. Dry-humored, cynical, great looking wife, nice apartment, Loyola grad.

Milwaukee (Marquette) - Richie Cunningham. Another precocious teen, All American kid.

Omaha (Creighton) - Penny on Big Bang Theory. Good looking, corn-fed, promiscuous All American girl.

Providence (PC) - No sitcom or character or anything was ever set here... maybe the Alec Baldwin father character in "Outside Providence" who wore a wife beater tshirt, drank too much, swore too much, he seemed like a Rhode Islander.... Ben Stiller's character in "Something About Mary" was funny but weird.... there was the Love Story character... the irritating girlfriend who got sick was from Cranston... also, there was a soap opera with Melina Kanakarides and BJ Honeycutt that was set here... maybe we can piggyback off the many Boston shows... say, Coach from "Cheers".

So, all i knew was that people from Queens were bigots, people from Indiana were dim farmboys, people from Cincinnati were milquetoasts (or voluptuous Loni Anderson types), Providence people were thought of as drinking, swearing types, etc...

[friars321]

D. Harrision has to be up there with the top ahole's in the league.
After a close loss to PC last yr he shoved Henton after the buzzer. And then refused to shake hands.
Good player though.

[robinreed]

Funny stuff Kirk...
Low budget Abercrombie & Fitch...

I always thought it was interesting how TV or movie characters were portrayed in each city... growing up in RI and never crossing the state borders much except to go to Attleboro or Seekonk, these characters were the window to each city...

Working westward:

Queens NY (St John's) - Archie Bunker. Racist, bigoted. Average middle class neighborhood.

New Jersey (Seton Hall) - Tony Soprano. Mafia, glutton, womanizer, murderer.

Washington DC (Georgetown) - Frank Underwood. Crooked, deceitful politician.

Philadelphia (Villanova) - Fresh Prince. Nice kid, precocious. I don't watch "It's Always Sunny", but they seem like oddballs.

Cincinnati (Xavier) - Les Nessman. Serious, nice, geeky, uptight, milquetoast, dependable guy, who takes his job seriously.

Indianapolis (Butler) - Woody Harrelson on "Cheers"... nice, innocent, not too swift, naive farm kid.

Chicago (DePaul) - Bob Newhart. Dry-humored, cynical, great looking wife, nice apartment, Loyola grad.

Milwaukee (Marquette) - Richie Cunningham. Another precocious teen, All American kid.

Omaha (Creighton) - Penny on Big Bang Theory. Good looking, corn-fed, promiscuous All American girl.

Providence (PC) - No sitcom or character or anything was ever set here... maybe the Alec Baldwin father character in "Outside Providence" who wore a wife beater tshirt, drank too much, swore too much, he seemed like a Rhode Islander.... Ben Stiller's character in "Something About Mary" was funny but weird.... there was the Love Story character... the irritating girlfriend who got sick was from Cranston... also, there was a soap opera with Melina Kanakarides and BJ Honeycutt that was set here... maybe we can piggyback off the many Boston shows... say, Coach from "Cheers".

So, all i knew was that people from Queens were bigots, people from Indiana were dim farmboys, people from Cincinnati were milquetoasts (or voluptuous Loni Anderson types), Providence people were thought of as drinking, swearing types, etc...

Billy Jack,
I have lived in Cincy all but 5 years of my life. I am still looking for Loni Anderson. Where are you Loni?

[cu blujs]

Milwaukee (Marquette) - Richie Cunningham. Another precocious teen, All American kid.

Personally, I prefer that cute girl, Shirley, who works at the brewery.

[muskienick]

Funny stuff Kirk...
Low budget Abercrombie & Fitch...

I always thought it was interesting how TV or movie characters were portrayed in each city... growing up in RI and never crossing the state borders much except to go to Attleboro or Seekonk, these characters were the window to each city...

Working westward:

Queens NY (St John's) - Archie Bunker. Racist, bigoted. Average middle class neighborhood.

New Jersey (Seton Hall) - Tony Soprano. Mafia, glutton, womanizer, murderer.

Washington DC (Georgetown) - Frank Underwood. Crooked, deceitful politician.

Philadelphia (Villanova) - Fresh Prince. Nice kid, precocious. I don't watch "It's Always Sunny", but they seem like oddballs.

Cincinnati (Xavier) - Les Nessman. Serious, nice, geeky, uptight, milquetoast, dependable guy, who takes his job seriously.

Indianapolis (Butler) - Woody Harrelson on "Cheers"... nice, innocent, not too swift, naive farm kid.

Chicago (DePaul) - Bob Newhart. Dry-humored, cynical, great looking wife, nice apartment, Loyola grad.

Milwaukee (Marquette) - Richie Cunningham. Another precocious teen, All American kid.

Omaha (Creighton) - Penny on Big Bang Theory. Good looking, corn-fed, promiscuous All American girl.

Providence (PC) - No sitcom or character or anything was ever set here... maybe the Alec Baldwin father character in "Outside Providence" who wore a wife beater tshirt, drank too much, swore too much, he seemed like a Rhode Islander.... Ben Stiller's character in "Something About Mary" was funny but weird.... there was the Love Story character... the irritating girlfriend who got sick was from Cranston... also, there was a soap opera with Melina Kanakarides and BJ Honeycutt that was set here... maybe we can piggyback off the many Boston shows... say, Coach from "Cheers".

So, all i knew was that people from Queens were bigots, people from Indiana were dim farmboys, people from Cincinnati were milquetoasts (or voluptuous Loni Anderson types), Providence people were thought of as drinking, swearing types, etc...

Billy Jack,
I have lived in Cincy all but 5 years of my life. I am still looking for Loni Anderson. Where are you Loni?

RR, who needs Loni Anderson??? We had Kathy Bates in town doing her lawyer show a couple of years ago and she's a lot more woman than Loni!

[billyjack]

Actually, now that I think of it, WKRP had the other good looking woman named "Bailey Quarters"... imo, even better looking than Loni...

[aughnanure]

Marquette: Holy Personality Disorders, Batman. Pick a name and stick with it. You've been the Warriors, the Lightning, the Warriors again, then the Golden Eagles, then nearly the Warriors again (to the point where everyone just calls you that anyway because it's just easier at this point), then for a week you were the Gold and that was f---ing weird, and then back to Golden Eagles...and that's all just since 1993, and not including at least three other nicknames held before then.
.

Wait, when the hell were we the lightning? Like...ever. We did not go from Warriors to Lightning back to Warriors.